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my life

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The past few months have been unbelievable! First, Master's father passed away. I was left in Master's house while he went back home to deal with things. I was chained to my bed 24/7 for over a week. One of Master's friends came by daily to give me food and he bathed me a few times and took care of my needs. I've never felt so much like an animal...a pet left in the care of someone while my Master was away. His friend who saw to my needs, used me hard a few times. It was obvious that he saw me as nothing more than an object. Which is what I am of course. I was very happy to see my own Master return.

Then Master broke his leg. It was an honor to care for him and meet his needs during this difficult time.

Things seem to be getting back to normal. We're back to my daily beatings and things are running smoothly. It's good to have Master strong and happy again.

Life is good..as slave to Master A.

Current Mood:
content content
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Master A has had houseguests since Thursday evening. Friends of his from out of town. I think I've cooked more these past three days that I have in the past month. I did their laundry, picked up after them, served them and met their every need. They used me at their will. I'm sore and bruised and happy that I pleased Master. He praised me, saying I did very well. There were no women in the group. I have a taste for pussy. I wonder if Master has any women friends that migh visit sometime sooon. That would be nice.
Current Mood:
tired tired
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Master sat me down tonight for a talk. He said during this time of adjustment, he wanted to talk to me about where we are It was kind of an oral report card I guess. He says he's very happy with my performance and that I'm very obedient. But he thinks I'm holding back emotionally, just going through the motions. I suppose he's right. I do and say all the things I'm supposed to do but still, I'm not sure I've given myself mentally yet.

It's so hard. I never thought I'd be in a position to learn to serve another Master. I think it's going to take time and Master is very understanding of that. And it was kind of him to have this talk with me. He didn't have to do it. He wans me to think about it for a few days and then we'll have another talk where I'll be able to speak freely and ask any questions I want or express any concerns I might have.

Much pondering to do as I learn to be the best slave I can be...to Master A.

Current Mood:
contemplative contemplative
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Master A is out for a few hours playing golf with friends. He was very pleased with my first journal entry but warned me that there would be some people who might say some cruel things. I'm not sure how I'll respond.

Ok to continue with my life as a slave:

I have permanent chains on my ankles and wrists. I wear my collar at all times. I'm always naked. Master A does not require me to wear my heels as my former Master did and you have no idea how happy that makes me. Walking around in those things is hell, let me tell you! Master feels a slave should be barefoot. Fine by me!

I'm trained in all areas. Master is a great believer in pain and humiliation. He says it keeps me in my place as a slave and reminds me of my helpless position. I'm whipped regularly, never without his marks. He bathes me and shaves me, tending to me as he would a pet. He considers it his responsibility. I'm totally dependent on him for everything. I have all that I need. He's always fair and never allows his moods to dictate how he deals with me.

Master has many friends in this lifestyle and doesn't particularly try to hide who and what he is. I have some friends (other slaves) but am not allowed a lot of private communications with them. I am to focus on my Master and he is to be everything to me.

I don't have "things." I own nothing. I have a room in Master's basement. Very small with a small bed and a chair and lamp. It's not decorated or adorned. But it's cozy and warm. There are times when I'm allowed to sleep in Master's bed, but more often, I'm chained to my own little bed. If I have to piss during the night, too bad. I'm not unchained until Master decides. I do have an intercom I can turn no to call him if it's important...but it had better be important.

Master A has laid out very clearly the rules of his house. I don't get second chances. He's much more strict than my former Master. But it's for my own good. I'm not happy unless I'm controlled completely.

I'm in charge of keeping Master's home clean and his meals. He gives me a menu at the beginning of the week and takes me shopping for the food. When he takes me out this way, I wear a coat and shoes, nothing else. During the summer months, he dresses me in as little as I can get away with without getting arrested. Master likes for others to look at and admire his slave.

I've been trained to do exactly what I'm told without question. I don't think about how it feels or what I want or don't want. All I want is to please my Master and I trust him not to send me to a place I cannot handle.

Master uses me for his enjoyment or his entertainment or puts me in my pen (my little room) when he doesn't require my presence. I exist for him. For example, last night he was late getting home from work. I was keeping his dinner warm for him, knowing he was working late. I met him at the door on my knees as I always am required to do. He patted me on the head and went straight to the shower to wash away the stresses of his long day. When he was finished, his dinner was on the table waiting for him. I sat on my knees at his feet as always and he droped food in my bowl while he ate. Yes, I eat and drink from a dog bowl. Before he leaves in the mornings, he tells me what I may eat that day. Nothing besides that. So after he finished eating, I cleaned up the dishes and my bowl after which I reported to him in the living room, kneeling beside him. He was tired; I could see it in his eyes. He put me on my hands and knees on the couch beside him with my ass in the air. As he watch TV, he fingered me absent-mindedly. I was of course not allowed to cum (I rarely am). But this was relaxing for him. I had to stay perfectly still while he fingered my pussy and asshole. When he was ready to go to bed, he took me out to piss and then put me in my pen. There I stayed until 10:00 this morning when he came to get me to fix his breakfast.

This is just an example of one night. Some nights, I'm allowed to watch TV with him, at his feet on the floor. Almost a normal setting, except that I'm naked and sitting on the floor! This may sound out of this world to some. But it's a normal life for a lot of people. As time goes on, I'll describe more of my life. slave to Master A.
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My name is abbra. I'm what is called a captive slave. I grew up with two very loving parents in a happy home. I have nothing but happy memories of my childhood. But I suppose society in general wouldn't agaree. My home and my parents weren't exactly what one would call traditional. My parents were Master and slave. And they were desperately in love. They didn't become Master and slave until they had been married for a couple of years. But they came to believe that a woman is meant to serve a man and that's what I was taught.

I'm the youngest of three girls. We were raised knowing that we would be slaves and we never questioned this. We saw how happy our parents were and wanted the same kind of life for ourselves. My father ruled with a stern hand and a loving heart. My mother always bowed to his will. He respected her commitment to the live they had chosen to live. We knew nothing about what went on between them in private of course but they were happy.

We were home schooled and didn't have a lot of contact with other kids. Oh we took dance lessons, riding lessons, gymnastics, etc. so we did know other kids but our time with them was closely monitored. We were kept steady on the path of becoming a slave and our parents felt that the outside world would interfee and distract us. They were right of course because so many people tend to be afraid of anything that is different or that they don't understand. I think that's so sad.

When each of us turned sixteen, our parents began the task of finding a suitable Master. Our father made the final choice but he thought our mother very wise and always listened to her opinions. By the time I was sixteen, I had watched the process twice already with my sisters so I knew what was going to take place. My parents started taking me to functions with their friends and put out the word that they were actively seeking a Master for their youngest daughter. I guess many people don't even realize that this kind of thing goes on in the good old USA but it does. More than they realize.

As I said, I was closely monitored growing up and was kept a virgin. I knew little about what happens between a man and a woman, much less a Master and his slave. My father interviewed many men. I was only allowed to meet the ones he felt might be suitable. His main objective was to find someone who would be responsible and never mistreat me. You see, I was not prepared to ever make it on my own. I was taught that my Master would be my caretaker and my protecter.

At seventeen, my father finally decided on a Master for his baby girl. He was thirty six years old, a successful businessman. The day I was introduced to him was the day he was to take me away. I wasn't nervous because this was the day I had always knew would come. I wasn't scared beause I knew my father would never give me to anyone unless he was sure I'd be safe. I know money changed hands but I have no idea how much. The last thing I remember is looking back just before stepping into his car, seeing my mother standing there by my father. She was crying and smiling. It's the last time I saw either of them.

I'm not going to go into detail right now but my Master was a very skilled trainer. He took great care in training me to be a good slave. He was strict and believed in discipline. But he never hesitated to praise me when I pleased him. After a couple of years, he married. But not much changed for me. His wife knew that I was part of the package. She was not submissive. They seemed happy but I knew he couldn't get from her what he needed. She and I adjusted to living in the same house and things just flowed right along. Changing, but staying the same, if that makes sense. Then a couple of years ago, my Master began to have some health problems. The day came when he told me he simply wasn't able to keep me anymore. So again, the search began for a new Master.

Less than a year ago, I was transferred to my current Master. It's a big adjustment and I'm still working on learning to serve someone other than the one who trained me. It's been difficult. One of the first things he told me was that he wanted me to have a journal and that I can feel free to express all my thoughts and feelings. He also wants it to be public so others can read. I fully expect negative feedback. People don't understand and never will. But this is my life. Like anyone else's life, it's not always roses. But it's who I am.

I will continue to write and will tell about my day-to-day life. My life as slave to Master A.
Current Mood:
hopeful hopeful
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